LIFELINE Newsletter - PDF Download - August 2017
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Everybody welcomed the birth of your baby, and showered you with flowers and gifts at the hospital. How wonderful it feels to be a mother! Your baby looks so adorable, just sleeping all the time. A few days later, you and your baby are brought home from the hospital and you are alone with just your husband and the members of your household. Suddenly, your slumbering baby starts wailing at the top his lungs – and does not stop. On your part, you suddenly feel the tiredness and you are still in pain from giving birth. In a flash, your fairy tale ends.
Rest assured, however, that you are not alone in what you are going through. Many new mothers have gone through the exact same thing in their first few weeks at home with their babies. It is not about you, nor is it about your little one. The first few weeks at home for new mothers and their babies are really tough! How can you keep your peace amid your baby’s constant crying?
Understand where your baby is coming from: Crying is the most important mechanism newborns have for communicating with their world. Your baby is crying because he is trying to tell you something. New mothers often panic when their babies cry. Instinctively, they say to themselves, “What am I doing wrong?” To help you keep calm, remember that your baby is calling out to you when he is crying. So, go and cuddle him – even if at times, you cannot figure out the reason for the crying. Holding your baby lets him know you are trying your best.
Understand what is happening to you and your own body: You are going through a new period in your life as well, and this can add to your stress. Your first few weeks postpartum involve your body’s adjusting – both physically and psychologically – to the process of childbearing. It lasts for about six weeks or until the body has completed its adjustment and has returned to a near pre-pregnant state.
Rest, rest, rest!: Your first few weeks at home should be spent resting – preferably in bed and with your baby. Do not be ashamed of just wanting to sleep all day! You need lots of sleep in order to get stronger, and if you are up frequently at night – to change your baby’s diapers, for instance – napping during the day recharges you, thus making you better able to deal with your baby’s cring or fussing.
Breastfeeding can do wonders – both for you and your baby: When you breastfeed, your body releases prolactin and oxytocin. Both hormones help you feel relaxed, calm, sleepy – and oxytocin makes ou fall in love with your baby – literally! Not only will breastfeeding relax you, it will calm your baby down as well. Even if he is not hungry but is fussy, you ma try putting your baby to the breast to help him relax – and again, to let him know you are just right beside him!
Have another person calm your baby down: Your baby’s crying is not about you. He is just having it rough in her first few weeks outside your womb. Sometimes, a baby reacts to your own anxiety and becomes calm in the arms of somebody more detached. After you have had a break, you will be recharged and your baby will feel it as well when you take him back in your arms.
Talk to a close friend: Do not be surprised if you sometimes find yourself crying frustratedly at the same time that your baby is crying.. When it happens, call a friend. It works for some new moms to call their own moms and say, “Mom, my baby doesn’t want to stop crying! I’m going crazy here! Help!” Your first few weeks at home can be a rollercoaster ride of emotions for both you and your baby. Do remember that this is a getting-to-know-you stage for both you and your newborn. But motherhood is not a fairy tale, after all. It is a wonderful reality – imperfect in some parts but beautiful altogether. With patience on your side, you will soon wake up and see yourself so attuned to your baby’s needs and wants. Endless crying will be but a thing of the past..
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